Queen Of The Dirt

Why is it as I get older I feel like my friends are getting more and more selfish and bitchy. I thought as women age they became more reliable and less self involved. I mean all these television shows and movies about women and friendship is such bullshit. Do not get me wrong I have a few awesome friends that I can totally count on but not NEAR as many as I thought. The older I get (and I am only 30) the more I think women are such bitches. There is nothing in me that thinks “girls stick together” blah blah blah. Bullshit. People are assholes. And women are bitches.

I mean I have “friends” that have been my “friend” for YEARS and still can sell me out without given it a second thought. I have “friends” that will look each other straight in the eyes and outright LIE. What is wrong here? Why are we not treating each other like real friends? Is this everyone? All friendships? Is it me too? Am I a bad friend? It seems ridiculous, like high school sometimes.

All I know is that my mama was right when she said you will only have a few good friends that remain good friends for your entire life. I thought she was just a cynical old jaded woman. She was either right or I have become a cynical old jaded woman. I do find myself wanting to tell my daughter many of the same life lessons my mother told me. Scary!

It just seems to me that we should have each others back. You know like they do in all those bullshit sitcoms and movies. Those shouldn’t be BullShit they should be the reality of how we treat each other. I think I am a good friend. I try to always do what I say I am going to do and be there for a friend in need, whether it be something as simple as picking up a kid at school if they need to work late or come to birthday parties or talk about stuff that is important to them that I care less about etc. It just seems as though some of these people are not as “able” to return these favors. Maybe they are selfish and maybe I am to giving. Either way, it sucks.

As I said earlier there are still a couple awesome friendships that go equally both ways. These are the people I know will remain in my life, while the others will most likely fade away.

Truth